Learning That Your Child Has Misbehaved in Childcare
This is never good news for any parent. It could be very disturbing and a little stressful. However, hearing this can be beneficial as well. To explain, if you went to a doctor once a month for 3 years and with every visit the doctor gave you a good prognosis. And on your 4th year, you visit another doctor who tells you that you have a tumor that has been growing for 3 years. And this tumor may be cancerous. You would probably think, why didn’t my doctor tell me? I could of done something about it. And no, a misbehaving child is not as serious as cancer. But if not corrected, could lead to more serious issues down the road. Some childcare providers will never mention to a parent that their child has a behavior issue. For various reasons a provider may do this. Some may not care, some may feel that the parent may get too stressed out if they mention it. Some providers may feel intimidated by the parent. Not mentioning the bad behavior is like the example of the doctor, because the doctor failed to mention the tumor it has the potential to cause more harm than good. Again, I am not saying that a young child’s bad behavior is as serious as a tumor.
But you get the point? What I am saying is, that some bad behavior can be the result of something bigger than the parent or teacher may think. Or maybe not. But when a teacher mentions a consistency in bad behavior, listen. That is a teacher who cares. That teacher wants to see your child thrive. Sometimes children behavior could be a result of something going on at home. Are both mom and dad together? Has there been a change or shift in a family’s lifestyle? Has there been a death in the family? Has either parent taken a longer work schedule and may not be at home as much? Because a child can not articulate or express their feelings like adults can, they may often times use bad behavior as a signal to get someone’s attention. Even at the expense of being put in the time out chair. So together the parent and the teacher can work a strategy appropriate for your child, so that the bad behavior can change or improve. Be sure to talk to your child everyday about the bad behavior. Don’t take it personal when confronted by a teacher. Some parents may think that the teacher is picking on their child. Be consistent in your efforts to change the bad behavior. Children are creatures of habit. If you tire out, your child will notice that you have given in, and there will be no change in behavior. They will depend on your discipline, believe it or not. It will show them that you care.
Be loving! Spend quality time with your child. Explain why the bad behavior is not acceptable. Talk to the teachers constantly. Thank the teachers for letting you know. Keeping the lines of communication open with your child's teacher is essential. The both of you will act as team to help the child. Be your child’s biggest advocate! Reward him/her for good behavior, and not for bad. Express concern, and do what you can to turn things around for the better. It can be done,, but it takes work, effort and determination. If you don’t try, or if you don’t address it, like that tumor, the bad behavior can and will only get worst!